help

i signed up for online therapy today. i don’t know if i really believe in it or not, but i figured it couldn’t hurt. seeing as i have literally no one else to talk to at this point, i guess it’s something.

i also messaged k8 last night and wrote a comment to her blog post from 2005. she’s probably the only one who i might even feel a little bit comfortable talking to about things. that might have been a mistake. it’s probably been too long since we last talked. i hope my message doesn’t upset her. that’s the last thing i want. although it’s completely unfair for me to expect a response, i really hope i get one anyways. not that i would even deserve it.

it’s m’s birthday today, and as much as i really really really want to send a message, i won’t. i can’t go back there. that’s done. i fucked that up beyond imagination.

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