this year, more than any i can remember, my usual excitement about christmas was definitely forced. there are simply too many things going on this year, too many important changes, too many secrets, too many hidden agendas, too many things missing and too many things just backwards. this seems to be applied universally across everything i know.
so being genuinely excited for christmas like i usually am seemed almost impossible. but, as the expression goes, fake it until you make it. and i made it. and many things did work out well. and ultimately i am thankful.
there are a couple very notable things however which i want to recognize.
k has found a house, made an offer, negotiated and signed contingent on an inspection. that is huge. everyone is on vacation until the 6th, however once the inspectors, banks and notaries are back at work, this could possibly go very quickly. the place is currently vacant, so there’s no delay waiting for that… it’s just a matter of signing paperwork. there is some work that needs to be done on the house, but it is largely cosmetic. i do worry a little that k will drag her feet on that and try to stay here as long as possible. which, within reason is fine, but already she was suggesting pushing notary until february and move in till march… just because. i don’t want to be an ass about it, but at the same time, keeping this pot on the stove longer than is necessary with cause the bottom to burn. and no one likes a burnt stew. in any case… progress!
the other thing i want to recognize, a, you are still a beautiful mystery to me and surprise me every single day. what you gave me for christmas goes beyond thoughtful. it goes beyond anything i have ever received from anyone before. when i told you i was speechless, i wasn’t lying or just turning a phrase, i literally have no words to describe what that meant to me, and even now, over 24 hours later, i still don’t even know what to say. you make me happy in a way i have been missing for so fucking long.